Thursday, August 09, 2007

FBO: 'The Delaware Trilogy (Part III): Cancelled'

The FBO regrets to announce that the third part of the Delaware Trilogy, concocted after a wildly successful North & East Delaware/Failed Bands of Oklahoma cultural symposium a week ago, has been cancelled.


Originally plans for the third, and final, installment of the trilogy was a three-part play entitled 'REVERANCE FOR THE RODNEY RIDE.' The wart-faced hero of Delaware is a legend in the 'first state,' though largely unknown once you cross the Delaware River. Delaware's commemorative quarter features Caesar riding on his horse -- to Philadelphia, in a frenzy, to sign the Declaration of Independence. Statues and testimonials of Mr Rodney's achievement -- without him, it's possible, Delaware wouldn't even be the 'first state'-- are everywhere in Delaware.

The FBO finds it curious that his ride to Philadelphia is so concretely linked with his horse. Surely his penmanship, his conviction are more important? Do we celebrate an Indianapolis Colts Super Bowl victory by waving flags showing the likeness of the team bus? No. But one wonders if it isn't in response to the popularity and lore and legend Massachusetts resident Paul Revere has received for his, likely exaggerated, ride to warn 'the British are coming, the British are coming!' in the wake of the Revolutionary War. 'Hey,' Delawarean historians seem to say, but a bit too late, 'We rode a horse quick too!'

The three-part play would explore the relationship between these two men, much of it would be fictional. The play -- and resultant film -- would star Will Arnett as Paul Revere and Will Ferrell as Caesar Rodney, who'd cry at one pitiful public soliloquy, 'But I rode a horse, I rode a horse too!'

After careful consideration, and discussions heard at the symposium, the FBO now considers Rodney's frantic horse ride made with US independence in mind,as more historically important than that 'Masshole' Paul Revere's. It also happened first. Hence:

--> The FBO bans Paul Revere re-enactors -- and descendants -- from using this site.

FBO Admin
Mobile/Semi-Permanent HQ -- Brooklyn, NY

1 comment:

Kenny T. said...

"'Masshole' Paul Revere"

That's good stuff.